Decision Made! April 17, 2009

As of this week, I was able to accept my offer from UNC Greensboro – with no regrets!

A few days ago, Texas State came back to me with a small scholarship that would knock my out-of-state tuition down to in-state. I was glad to hear they were trying to entice me more, but as I stated before, I really wasn’t in love with this program. Part of me was worried, though, that this would be the best funding offer I’d get. (I should say, however, since my post about them in which I mentioned some negative stuff, their director contacted me and was nothing but nice and welcoming. I really respect them more now. And after finally getting my hands on some of their alumni’s poetry, I have no doubt that they’re a top-rate MFA program.)

So, I went back to UNCG and told them about the offer Texas State was giving me, and the director told me to hold tight because he and the poetry faculty  were going to do every thing they could to find me some money. Along with that email came some more incredibly sweet words about how much they really wanted me to be there – words that made my heart swell to 3 times its size – and that may have been more valuable than all the rest of it!

I spent a few days in agony, waiting to hear if things would fall into place. Then yesterday, I got confirmation from UNCG that they’d found me a Research Assistantship job in their English department for my first year – a job that will pay for all of my tuition but $800 in fees and will give me a stipend of $13,500!

I am beyond happy, beyond thrilled, beyond overjoyed! And I’m eager to get my butt up there, but I’ve got to work out the next few months here – finishing my job, packing up and closing my life here in Charlotte.

Thank you to all of you who have watched me through this journey and sent your words of support. I really appreciate the encouragement and also the vehicle to express all the insane amount of emotions that went through me as I took on the task of applying to MFA programs.

I don’t see the MFA as the end-all-be-all, and I know being a writer isn’t about a degree or school of thought. I am just as much of a writer now without it. But, as my dad said on the phone with me tonight, it’s a new chapter of my life and one that I worked hard to get. And for that, I’m thankful and excited to see what comes next!

Waitlisted, again! April 7, 2009

I just heard from my last school. I’m on the waitlist at Arizona State, which just created another one of those, oh YAY I don’t COMPLETELY suck…but huh…what now? moments.

I replied to their nice email (in which I was told the poetry faculty really liked my creative work) thanking them and asking if they thought I should wait around for any news before April 15, and if accepted people receive funding and/or out-of-state tuition waivers. Like everyone else in this economy, they said they’re experiencing budget cuts.

And then I emailed Arkansas asking for the same update from them.

So, I’m back to where I was – no firm funding offers for my few firm acceptances, and no firm status on my waitlists. BUT, there’s still the possibility that I may get a job at UNCG – it’s just that they haven’t called me for an interview yet and it could be one of those things that doesn’t come thru until after April 15.

Speaking of April 15, that’s um, 8 days away!

How hilarious it all is April 6, 2009

email received 4/1/09:

“Emily, I just received an updated list of assistantship positions (and the likes) and realized that you haven’t been NOT awarded a position (I know, double negative), but you are on the waiting list. The department will be
continuing to make offers for assistantships. Those who were offered
assistantships first are accepting or declining over the next week or so.”

Nearly April March 28, 2009

The mail brought no news with it today, but I do have some updates.

I went to visit Greensboro last weekend and had a great time.  I attended a reading with graduating students and then went to a party afterward. It was a late night, and a student let me crash at her place instead of driving back or getting a hotel. All around, I had a blast. I felt like I fit in. The students were just as nice in person as they were in email (I had communicated with 5 before going up there.) And the program community is bigger than it seems because alumni stick around and a lot of other people in the English department take interest in the MFA students. In my heart, it’s where I should be. Everyone I met was interesting, fun, and kind. I drove back on Saturday elated, and have spent the past week emailing back-and-forth with other potential first years. I’ve almost become an unofficial recruiter for the 09 incoming class. Maybe it’s paying off, becaues Jim (the director) told me he thinks he found me a first-year job in the college of arts & sciences with enough funding to cover most of tuition  and then some ($10K stipend). Everything is pushing me in the direction of Greensboro, and I’m not fighting it, except that I feel like I should have all my choices on the table before accepting their offer. I don’t know if this is good business instinct or what. Maybe I should just go ahead and jump in.

I’m still waiting to hear about funding from Texas State. I really don’t know what to think about this program now. They seemed so good on paper, but the communication and information flow from them has been staggered and slow. It took me finding out that I was accepted (online) to hear from anyone personally (I contacted their MFA coordinator just to be sure). I’ve asked questions and gotten vague answers from the coordinator. I had to put my foot down last week to finally get her to give me more than 1 student contact, and even then, I have just 3, and only 1 has replied with answers to my questions. I also had to ask twice to get alumni publishing success/history/information. (Her first reply was “I don’t have that on my computer.”) I still haven’t heard from the director or any faculty yet. I don’t like this uphill battle with them, and I probably won’t take their offer, but I feel like I should at least hear what the entire offer is before ruling them out.  Jim says they have a lot of money down there. I wonder if he’s eager to know what they give me just for the sake of bartering, although I don’t know if it could get me any more money at UNCG.
I also haven’t heard A PEEP from Alabama or ASU. I’ve emailed them both, politely asking for status updates since I have other offers to consider, and neither have replied. My online status with them hasn’t changed, although I check it daily.  I’m guessing I’m either rejected at those places and they’re taking their time notifying, or I’m on some sort of blind waitlist and they don’t want to get my hopes up by telling me so.

No word from Arkansas since I got their waitlist letter, either. I wrote back to thank them, though.

So, I’m just truckin’ along, waiting to have all my answers. It’s nearly April, and the showers are coming in strong here. I hope I can make my decision soon, because I know the next few months are going to fly by. But as long as I’m still in the thick of deciding, I can keep putting off all the preparations for moving. Or at least that’s what I keep telling myself!

Waitlisted! March 13, 2009

as someone on the P&W Speakeasy just told me, Welcome to Limbo!

I received an email this afternoon telling me I’m on a short waitlist for the MFA poetry program at University of Arkansas! They are accepting only 5 people this year.

woooweeewooowweee….!

initial thoughts:

• I’d put Arkansas on par with UNC Greensboro for great faculty, alumni, and overall reputation.
• Getting a very nice, personal email from their director is much appreciated. (And I have yet to hear from the director or any faculty at Texas State. More on that later…)
• Hmm…funding? (always a question)
• Do I want to be in school for 3-4 years? Arkansas is known for keeping their writers in Fayetteville for a long time.
• Where the heck is Fayetteville?
• Should I visit?

Ok, the rest of my afternoon will be spent on Craigslist and Google Maps…

The Tally March 12, 2009

UNC Greensboro – accepted, funding TBA

Texas State – accepted, funding TBA

UT Austin Michener MFA - rejected

UT Austin MA – rejected

Montana – rejected

Minnesota – rejected

Alabama – rejected

Arkansas – waitlisted

Arizona – rejected

Arizona State – waitlisted

Vanderbilt – rejected

*updated 4/7/09

Q & A March 4, 2009

someone on the Poets & Writers speakeasy message forum put out a questionaire for MFA applicants with acceptance offers. I bit the bait, and here are my answers reposted here:

 

what genre are you ? poetry

which schools were you accepted to? This is my second year applying so I’ll break it up that way.

This year: I’ve been accepted to UNC Greensboro & Texas State. I’m still waiting to hear about funding, and I have 6 other programs that haven’t notified me yet. I have 2 rejections so far.

Last year: Accepted without funding to VCU, Sarah Lawrence, & UM-St. Louis, then waitlisted at UNCG. (& rejected from 6 other programs.)

how long have you been workshopping/writing seriously? I started writing workshops in undergrad. I minored in creative writing and therefore had workshops for at least 5 semesters. I took a break from workshops and poetry for about 3 years out of school, but I also worked as a newspaper writer then. I picked up poetry seriously again about a year before I applied to MFAs the first time. After turning down MFA offers last spring, I found two local writing workshops. One was a small group and the other a much larger group. Both were cross-genre workshops and had very few poets involved. In fact, most of the time, I was the only one writing poetry and the rest were fiction writers. But they definitely helped me polish my poetry.

Are you published? yes, I’ve had poems published by a few print and online journals. Most of them are local, but a couple are more well known.

What did you do to prepare your pieces for your applications? This time around, I had more people read through my portfolio and had them help me decide what I should include in my writing sample. I found this a major help, because my friends were better judges of my best work, and helped me shape a writing sample that demonstrated a consistent voice. Also, I should note that 90% of the poems I put in this year’s writing sample were stuff I’ve worked on in the past 9-16 months. Only one poem was written in undergrad.

Were you an active part of the writers’ networking communities/did you meet influential people at the schools before the apps? I already knew the UNCG people from being on the waitlist last year, and had gone up to visit them then. (But I didn’t know anyone there before I was on the waitlist.) They deferred my application and told me to send them a new writing sample and another letter of recommendation this time around. I reached out to a professor at my university who had graduated from UNCG’s MFA and asked her to meet with me, in hopes that she could help me with this. I hadn’t had her for any classes when I was an undergrad, nor had we conversed outside of school, but she knew who I was when I contacted her and she was willing to look over my work. After going over my poetry, she offered to write me a letter of recommendation for UNCG, and then for all the schools I applied to this year. I’m sure getting to know her helped me as a writer – I certainly used her critique in my writing sample. But I wouldn’t say that she’s why I got accepted to UNCG, or any program. I was told by UNCG that my acceptance was based on the quality of my writing sample. (I haven’t talked to Texas State yet to know what won my acceptance over there.)

and for those who are waiting, it should be known that I didn’t receive my first acceptance last year until mid-March. hang in there!

March brings good news March 2, 2009

I found out today, via the online application status check, that I’m in at Texas State!! I hope there’s a letter in my mailbox at home to seal the deal. Then I’ll have to get some questions answered about funding and other details before deciding if I’ll plan a trip down to San Marcos.

This good news comes after two rejections in the past 4 days – UT Austin’s Michener Program & University of Minnesota.

Oh, and in other news, we have snow in the piedmont of North Carolina! Awesome, but also kind of crazy. It was 68 degrees here last week! If the power’s not out later tonight, I’ll try to do some more blogging, because obviously, my mind is full of questions and concerns and fantastical thoughts about my future. Thanks to all y’all who’ve been posting comments and sending me messages of encouragement. I plan on answering some questions for future MFA applicants soon, as well.

tick, tock, tick, tock February 23, 2009

…still waiting to hear from other schools. Minnesota’s website says they’re mailing notices today. I’ve already heard that Alabama rejection notes have gone out. My returned postcard from UT-Austin said decisions will be made late February/early March. Acceptances have already gone up on the boards for Alabama, Minnesota, Vanderbilt, and ASU. The rest of the schools – no idea what their schedules are like. No idea where I fit into their schemes.

I was doing good there for a while – of course, happy with my one acceptance, then mentally distracted by Valentine’s Day, then AWP. But now, now’s the time! C’mon, people! Tell me what you know.

Honestly, I would be OK if I get rejected from every other school I applied to. Sure, it would damage the ego a little bit, but then it would make the decision making process a lot easier. I could go ahead and plan my moving date and get on with life. But now I’m starting to get a little worried – what if I have to make A LOT of decisions, quickly? What if I get waitlisted somewhere really awesome, and then have to wait even longer just to make sure it’s not a possibility, too? what if, what if, what if…

This time last year, I was rushing home to the mailbox almost every day. Eating lots of chocolate. Losing my brain. I’m trying to keep my cool. I’ve been going to the gym more and getting home later. I still eat chocolate – thanks to those damn Girl Scouts! – but it’s not about filling a void right now. I think. I went to Trader Joe’s yesterday and stocked up on fruits and veggies just in case my needs kick up again.

In other news, my writers’ group this weekend was great. I was motivated last month to start writing a fiction piece, mainly because the poetry is stifled by this whole application process, and I was bored. I kept working on it over three weeks, and punched out around 8 pages in third draft form. This was the second piece of fiction I’ve ever written. The last one was 6 years ago. I submitted my new story to my group, a little uneasy. It wasn’t finished, and I’m so used to being the oddball in there. I’m one of a few poets and the rest of them are fiction writers. Not to mention, I think I probably talk the most (and dish the most constructive criticism) in the group, so I was waiting for the arrows to fly in my direction! But it went really well. They liked it. They really liked it. They actually wanted to read more, and are eager to hear how I finish it. Their criticisms were in the places where I expected it, because I was still working out those parts. The only negative thing from the whole experience is that I’ve realized what I have here. No longer is this little piece of fiction little. It’s working itself into a novella. I’ve dived in too far. I wasn’t ready for this! I’m going to school for poetry! I can’t be all things at once!

Sigh. OK. Things could be worse. At least I’ve got time on my side. Or do I?

Worth the wait February 10, 2009

Phew! It has hardly been a month since I last posted, and so much has happened. Thanks, Jeannine, for snapping me back into Reality. I just returned from a mini-vacation and I should have posted this before I left…because it is really good news…it just hadn’t settled in yet…

I got into UNC Greensboro’s program!

I found out last Friday, and it came as a complete surprise, mainly because of the way they notified me – by mail. After a long day at work, I met up with a friend for dinner and drinks. The restaurant was so close to my house that I *almost* went home to check my mailbox, but I gave myself a big girl pill and told myself that it’s ridiculous to keep checking my mail, you know you won’t hear from any schools until March. I made myself think this even though I had talked to the Greensboro director a couple weeks before. They had contacted me to tell me about the admissions process and where I was in it. They had told me I was doing good, as in, receiving high remarks from the faculty. I know, I should have mentioned this earlier, too, but I was trying to be good and not freak out too much. And really, I wasn’t sure what to make of it. I mean, they had liked my portfolio last year, too, but I didn’t make it higher than the waitlist. One of my recommenders this year was a graduate of their program, so I thought maybe they were just telling me nice things because of her letter. I even asked her if she knew anything, and she said to sit tight and wait. So, I waited. I waited 14 days after that phone call. That’s 14 days on top of a year of waiting, wondering if I’d be good enough to get in. I was getting pretty proud of that waiting. So proud that I let myself wait until 9 p.m. to check the mail on Friday.

I was on the phone with Scott at the time, and about to hang up, when I looked in the box and saw the giant envelope with Greensboro’s logo. I told him to hang on until I opened it. Even then, I was telling myself, oh this is just some stupid graduate housing mailer or other junk that graduate schools send you when they get your application. The envelope was so thin it made that idea easy to conjure. But no, when I read “congratulations” and “admission” and “Master of Fine Arts graduate program in writing” and saw they were all in the same line, I knew it was the real deal. I started screaming “I’m in! I’m in! I’m in!” and the cats scattered and I’m sure Scott had to pull the phone away from his ear. Then I called a few people and headed back out the door for more drinks, this time under the premise of celebration!

So, on this Tuesday morning, it’s still sinking in. I got in. I haven’t called everyone I need to tell yet. And of course, the awkward thing is since I had to go out of town until late last night, I haven’t had a chance to call the Greensboro MFA dept. to talk to them about my acceptance. I found it odd that they let me know of my admission from the graduate school instead of emailing or calling me like we’ve communicated before. But then again, it felt good to have an official letter in my hands. And I have fewer questions for them than other programs, because I became so familiar with the MFA program when I was on the waitlist last year. But I still want to tell them “thanks!” and see if there’s any more news on their end. I haven’t heard about funding yet, although I qualify for in-state tuition. Anyway, I hate that I have to sit here at my day job and can’t call them. (Maybe I’ll get out of the office for lunch or something – I dunno!)

But yeah, I feel like such a nut for applying to so many other programs (Can I get my money back? hehe), and now I have to wait to hear from them. I just didn’t believe that I had a sure fire chance of getting into Greensboro just because I was on their waitlist last year and had my application deferred. But, I’m still keeping my options open. There are a few schools that could be deal breakers, at least as far as funding. Other schools have the place factor going for them – the idea of moving somewhere completely different than the Southeast. And there are the yet-to-be-determined other factors that may win me over somewhere else, or at least flirt me in some other capacity…as Greensboro made me change my mind last year about the other schools where I was accepted. I guess you never know.

But for now, I’m so, SO happy with the idea of Greensboro! They definitely, all along, were one of my top choice schools. And it’s awesome that my first notification came as an acceptance letter this year. I’m so glad I gave myself another shot at this; it’s absolutely worth the wait!